Wow, what a night!
Something pretty crazy, good crazy, happened to me in the past 12 hours. It feels as I’ve been thinking about it for the last hour and a half or so, that I’ve just passed a turning point, and maybe this will be a huge pint in my life . . . time will tell, of course, and I’ll need to stay engaged and stay conscious.
During yesterday’s Week 11 webinar a lot of “dots” were connected for us all.
DMP + POA + PMA + MMA = Success!!
That’s very cool, for reals, and it’s not like it’s arcane, or unsuspected, but somehow, especially sharing the concepts with my MMA partner (my partner in this course and in life, my wonderful wife, Marvelous Marge), I think the heavy issues and concepts and thoughts about where we’ve been, where we are, and where we’re going all came together with some other stuff going on in my life.
I’ve been involved in some health stuff and also reading outside the MKMMA and I think what happened during the night last night was a confluence of all that’s going on and all the input I’ve been getting.
So one thing going on is I’m seeing a physiatrist and a physical therapist. The PT I was alrealdy working with to improve range of motion and to get some maintenance exercises for my shoulders after pretty extensive shoulder surgery in 2013. The guy I’m seeing also mentioned I have something called “forward neck posture” so I went to a physician he suggested, the physiatrist (works with body mechanics, essentially). She found some issues and sent me for X-rays. This happened last week and I’m going back with the X-rays on a CD for her input this coming Wednesday. Anyway, it’s kind of odd seeing inside yourself, especially your head and neck (at least it’s odd for me). So seeing that and also the shot with screws in my humerus (only 5 of 8 are showing because I also have 3 plastic screws in the same area.)
So one thing going on was an awareness of my essential physical essence.
Another thing happening was this past weekend I read John Durant’s The Paleo Manifesto, which is a look at human development in nutrition, exercise, health, behavior, hygiene, philosophy, religion, and economics from a variety of perspectives. As a human, I found this book fascinating and in some ways quite personal. Nothing dramatic, just got me thinking, that’s all.
OK, and the third element outside the class is I’ve been reading The Kybalion, purportedly written by The Three Initiates (most likely not really, most likely by just one guy). Anyway, The Kybalion is a source document summarizing very ancient writings and it’s totally in alignment with what we’re studying with Hill, Haanel, Mandino and also with Mark and Davene. This work refers to ancient Egyptian teachings from the time of Abraham which, according to the book, were incorporated into existing and emerging religions worldwide. It all certainly fits with Haanel. Deep study into the major laws.
So, I’ve had all this stuff swimming in my consciousness . . . my physical health and mechanical parts, species heritage and development, plus ancient teachings, and all of this in the background while focusing hard and working fairly rigorously on the materials and practices of the Master Key Mastermind Alliance. And with this week’s webinar as a pivot point where many of the pieces came together (or at least were made explicit by Mark and Davene), I guess I was set up for an interesting night.
I usually am aware of dreaming and most often my dreams are interesting or fun but mostly carry on the same themes and focus as my daily thought and actions. Last night however, I awoke two times, both times moaning and trying to get away from whatever was going on in my dreams (I don’t remember the specifics even now, but I clearly recall the emotions). So sometimes I have nightmares and they rarely bother me because of a conscious decision way back, I think when I was in my 20s, that I would observe or think about them but not let myself be bothered by “bad” dreams.
Anyway, both times when I awoke last night, and especially the second time, I felt a strong sense of relief, which was a bit odd since, in my dream at least I’d just gotten away from something unpleasant or threatening. I immediately had the concept of “purging” that I’d gone by, gotten past, or purged something that was, I don’t know, maybe holding me back or confusing me or something.
It’s a little funny (as in peculiar) that I don’t remember the content of the dreams but that I still have, three hours later, an abiding sense of relief and calm. It feels good.
So the upshot here is, there’s still loads of work to be done and I promise to “Do it now!” I know I can do it because “I can be what I WILL to be.” And somehow, in the past half day or so, I have the sense I’ve gotten past something that was maybe holding me back.
So this post is for me a capturing of catharsis. It’s pretty personal but maybe it will help someone else who’s feeling or experiencing extreme personal drama at this point in the MKMMA.